Hotel Artemis or Hotel Total-Miss?

Hotel Artemis should have been good. Look at that cast list and you have the makings of something amazing. You have Oscar winners, Hot up and coming actors…and Dave Bautista…what could possibly go wrong?

The answer is….so much

It’s unfortunate, as the idea is fantastic. In the near future, in the middle of riots all across America, “The Nurse” (Jodie Foster) runs Hotel Artemis, a members-only hotel-cum-Hospital where the underworld can come to get fixed up before being sent back out on their way. Bautista is the big orderly, and there’s plenty of crooks knocking around the place to make this a really intriguing prospect for a film.

But it just falls way short of what it could be.

Don’t get me wrong, the art direction of this art-deco style hotel being used as a hospital, along with some of the acting performances are absolutely on point. But when it’s backed up with a plot which is so horribly coincidental and insubstantial, it draws you way to far away from everything else.

I genuinely felt let down by the film as a whole as I wanted it to be good and found myself trying to force any “well that bit is well done” type thought into my brain, but it just wasn’t coming.

Unfortunately it suffers too much because of this. Whilst not being terrible, it’s not good either.

2/5